11-5-09 at 7 am!
Well, really, Hubs and I are the only ones who need to do it, but if you wanna, mark up that calendar!
This is the date of my scheduled C-Section. I was crossing my fingers that he would schedule it a week earlier (I can't take much more! Haha. I know, I'm awful.), which is what he originally talked about doing, but has now decided that he wants to push me to 39 weeks if possible.
He's also given me a prescription for an antibiotic to slow down/stop the contractions that I've started having...
Sadist.
In the same breath, however, he said that if I went into labor/my water broke in the next two weeks, he would just go ahead and deliver me, and Owen would be just fine.
Mixed Signals, much?
Way to play with my emotions, Doc.
I know it seems like I'm trying to shoo my child from the womb, and that sounds (reads) terribly neglectful, but I am SUPER uncomfortable, crampy, and peeing every 15 minutes. AND, not sleeping. These occurences do lead to insanity, in case you were wondering...
I realize that these are miniscule scarifices to make for a healthy baby, but I gotta tell ya:
It makes the next 5 weeks seem like a FRICKEN ETERNITY.
A urine-laden, sleep-deprived ETERNITY.
I have an ultrasound scheduled for next Friday afternoon with the perinatalogist.
He'll be checking Owen's fluid level and position, to see if he's on his way out...sooner rather than later, that is!
OWENWATCH 2009 is on!
Ps. I found out that Owen's circumcision is NOT covered by Medi-Cal. It's considered "cosmetic." Really? So, it's a $250 snippy-snip!
And he won't even appreciate it.
Kids these days.....
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
This is a Test of your Emergency Birthing System...
So Owen tried to make a break for it.
Well, I guess we can't really blame it all on him....
They think that my amniotic sac sprung a leak, which can obviously result in preterm labor, which OBVIOUSLY scared the living SHIT out of Owen's daddy and me.
We checked into the hospital on Thursday night, and they immediately put me in a room and hooked me up to a monitor.
IV antibiotics to prevent infection, and steroids to help develop Owen's premature lungs, immediately followed.
3 days of monitoring, tests and major panic attacks brought up the ranks.
It was absolutely terrifying. While they were confident of his survival, hearing words like "NICU," "breathing machines," "feeding tubes," etc., in regards to the birth of your child is just heart-stopping.
Particularly, when as his mother, you were born premature and have had a lot of problems as a result...
But good news all around!
The leak seems to have sealed itself up (apparently that happens), the baby is stable, I'm stable and all looks good for now.
The perinatalogist (sp?) does think that Owen will still be coming early...like possibly in the next 2 weeks (which will still make him premature, but not dangerously so, and the steroids have given him a leg up at this point).
WOAH.
He's fully positioned for birth already. His head is so buried in my cervix, they could not get a clear reading of the cervical length.
COMFY.
Freaks me out. I do not feel prepared for him yet! There's still a lot of cleaning and organzing to do! And now I'm on strict bed rest. CRAP!
(I know, I have issues.)
But as long as he is born healthy, that's all that matters.
In other news, I will be having a scheduled C-Section. My OB feels as though it is our safest option given my hip structure and pelvic muscles.
This was definitely not my original plan, but as I'm being forced to learn more and MORE every day, there is no PLANNING in parenthood. Akin to that old "No crying in Baseball" adage, I think...
Oh, and did I mention that my son is huge?
Yeah, he's already over 6 lbs.
His father is very proud.
I'm just resigning myself to adult diapers.
Think about it.
Anyway, wish me luck! Hopefully, we can keep Owen baking for as long as possible!
I have a follow up appointment on Wednesday, so I'll post an update then...
Well, I guess we can't really blame it all on him....
They think that my amniotic sac sprung a leak, which can obviously result in preterm labor, which OBVIOUSLY scared the living SHIT out of Owen's daddy and me.
We checked into the hospital on Thursday night, and they immediately put me in a room and hooked me up to a monitor.
IV antibiotics to prevent infection, and steroids to help develop Owen's premature lungs, immediately followed.
3 days of monitoring, tests and major panic attacks brought up the ranks.
It was absolutely terrifying. While they were confident of his survival, hearing words like "NICU," "breathing machines," "feeding tubes," etc., in regards to the birth of your child is just heart-stopping.
Particularly, when as his mother, you were born premature and have had a lot of problems as a result...
But good news all around!
The leak seems to have sealed itself up (apparently that happens), the baby is stable, I'm stable and all looks good for now.
The perinatalogist (sp?) does think that Owen will still be coming early...like possibly in the next 2 weeks (which will still make him premature, but not dangerously so, and the steroids have given him a leg up at this point).
WOAH.
He's fully positioned for birth already. His head is so buried in my cervix, they could not get a clear reading of the cervical length.
COMFY.
Freaks me out. I do not feel prepared for him yet! There's still a lot of cleaning and organzing to do! And now I'm on strict bed rest. CRAP!
(I know, I have issues.)
But as long as he is born healthy, that's all that matters.
In other news, I will be having a scheduled C-Section. My OB feels as though it is our safest option given my hip structure and pelvic muscles.
This was definitely not my original plan, but as I'm being forced to learn more and MORE every day, there is no PLANNING in parenthood. Akin to that old "No crying in Baseball" adage, I think...
Oh, and did I mention that my son is huge?
Yeah, he's already over 6 lbs.
His father is very proud.
I'm just resigning myself to adult diapers.
Think about it.
Anyway, wish me luck! Hopefully, we can keep Owen baking for as long as possible!
I have a follow up appointment on Wednesday, so I'll post an update then...
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Postapalooooooza!
As I mentined in my last post, there's a LOT of ground I need to cover!
Sorry for the lag, but we have been really busy, and if we're not busy, then I am trying desperately to rest....and deflate my snausage legs and feet. Oh, that crazy edema!
It's making me kinda antisocial, truth be told. I just want to stay home, in my underwear, under a fan, eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
This doesn't bode well for social-interaction....
But I digress--Let's get down to it.
4D ULTRASOUND PHOTOS:
DO it! They really are amazing. Yes, they are pricey, but totally worth it! Seeing your baby's face as it's starting to take shape, is mind-blowing. We also spent a little more to get the DVD of the actual ultrasound, which was a TRIP and a HALF. You get to see the baby moving in real time. We saw Owen kicking, SMILING, and moving his little mouth! He looked like he was talking to us!
Totally made me cry.
These are my faves:
Chubby Cheeks!
Baby Feet
Tiny Smile...(and he totally looks like Hubby's lil' bro)
Cutest Baby EVER!!! In my totally unbiased opinion.
FIRST BABY SHOWER:
It was really lovely. The house was filled with fabulous women, scrumptioussss cupcakes, and adoooooorable baby gifts. Owen made out like a bandit. He got tons of cute clothes and some really cool toys. We also had a diaper raffle which was a huge success.
We are so lucky to have so many people in our lives who are as excited about Owen's arrival as we are!
The Loot
We have NO IDEA where to put everything, and we still have another shower to go! Haha.
THE MATERNITY SHOOT:*
I decided that I HAD to do a maternity shoot. That was an odd urge for me, as I HAAAATE having my picture taken, and the fact that I am currently the size of an abnormally large Manatee, but nonetheless--my sentimentality won out.
This could be our only child. I want to document as much of this process as possible!
I asked a friend of mine who is super-creative to snap the pictures for us, and thankfully, she agreed! She did such a beautiful job!
Somehow though, I ended up mainly unclothed...I'm still not sure how that happened.
I went into the shoot thinking we were going to to the whole "wholesome-jeans-and-tanks" look, and instead, there was just a whole lotta me hanging out!
But ya know what?
My Hubs and I are not of the wholesome type. These pictures are so US. I'm glad that I ignored my insecurities and just went with it.
Looking at the the pictures made me so emotional!
It's crazy to think that in two years we've gone from this:
Engaged-Summer 2007
To this:
Wedding-Spring 2008
Allll the way to here:
Expecting-Spring 2009
It has been a life-changing, but amazing couple of years.
*There are tons more pictures on my facebook. Uploading on here is kinda tedious.
Sorry for the lag, but we have been really busy, and if we're not busy, then I am trying desperately to rest....and deflate my snausage legs and feet. Oh, that crazy edema!
It's making me kinda antisocial, truth be told. I just want to stay home, in my underwear, under a fan, eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
This doesn't bode well for social-interaction....
But I digress--Let's get down to it.
4D ULTRASOUND PHOTOS:
DO it! They really are amazing. Yes, they are pricey, but totally worth it! Seeing your baby's face as it's starting to take shape, is mind-blowing. We also spent a little more to get the DVD of the actual ultrasound, which was a TRIP and a HALF. You get to see the baby moving in real time. We saw Owen kicking, SMILING, and moving his little mouth! He looked like he was talking to us!
Totally made me cry.
These are my faves:
Chubby Cheeks!
Baby Feet
Tiny Smile...(and he totally looks like Hubby's lil' bro)
Cutest Baby EVER!!! In my totally unbiased opinion.
FIRST BABY SHOWER:
It was really lovely. The house was filled with fabulous women, scrumptioussss cupcakes, and adoooooorable baby gifts. Owen made out like a bandit. He got tons of cute clothes and some really cool toys. We also had a diaper raffle which was a huge success.
We are so lucky to have so many people in our lives who are as excited about Owen's arrival as we are!
The Loot
We have NO IDEA where to put everything, and we still have another shower to go! Haha.
THE MATERNITY SHOOT:*
I decided that I HAD to do a maternity shoot. That was an odd urge for me, as I HAAAATE having my picture taken, and the fact that I am currently the size of an abnormally large Manatee, but nonetheless--my sentimentality won out.
This could be our only child. I want to document as much of this process as possible!
I asked a friend of mine who is super-creative to snap the pictures for us, and thankfully, she agreed! She did such a beautiful job!
Somehow though, I ended up mainly unclothed...I'm still not sure how that happened.
I went into the shoot thinking we were going to to the whole "wholesome-jeans-and-tanks" look, and instead, there was just a whole lotta me hanging out!
But ya know what?
My Hubs and I are not of the wholesome type. These pictures are so US. I'm glad that I ignored my insecurities and just went with it.
Looking at the the pictures made me so emotional!
It's crazy to think that in two years we've gone from this:
Engaged-Summer 2007
To this:
Wedding-Spring 2008
Allll the way to here:
Expecting-Spring 2009
It has been a life-changing, but amazing couple of years.
*There are tons more pictures on my facebook. Uploading on here is kinda tedious.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
We need to talk...
...about Owen's 4D ultrasound pictures.
and the first baby shower.
AND starting lamaze classes.
BUT,
Let's do that later, K?
I'm exhausted.
I can't sleep in my own bed anymore.
I've taken up nightly residence in a Poang chair, with my feet propped up on our bed.
Yes, it's as awesome as it sounds....
After finally falling asleep at 1 am, I woke up at 4 am to nausea-inducing heartburn and upset stomach. By 5 am, a gnarly nosebleed joined the party.
6 am brought sleep.
8 am brought my Hubby's alarm.
By 10:30 am, I waved the white flag of surrender.
You win this round, Pregnancy!
Although, looking at this face:
Who needs sleep?
and the first baby shower.
AND starting lamaze classes.
BUT,
Let's do that later, K?
I'm exhausted.
I can't sleep in my own bed anymore.
I've taken up nightly residence in a Poang chair, with my feet propped up on our bed.
Yes, it's as awesome as it sounds....
After finally falling asleep at 1 am, I woke up at 4 am to nausea-inducing heartburn and upset stomach. By 5 am, a gnarly nosebleed joined the party.
6 am brought sleep.
8 am brought my Hubby's alarm.
By 10:30 am, I waved the white flag of surrender.
You win this round, Pregnancy!
Although, looking at this face:
Who needs sleep?
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
The Countdown Begins...can it go faster?
If O comes on time, he will be here in 62 days.
That seems like eons from now. Induction is seeming more and more lovely. Ha!
To be frank-
I am in so much pain, I can't F&^#ing STAND IT.
My lower body and its corresponding muscles and joints are staging a revolt.
They've been at if for a months, and they're not being peaceful about it...
They're making me feel useless and handicapped.
While I technically AM handicapped (I prefer the term disabled. Never use "handicapable in my presence, k? It will not end well), it's been a long time since I have truly felt that way.
I can't get out of bed without help. The stairs are my nemesis. I started crying while trying to put on my own underwear.
These are some old, familiar, feelings that I never wanted to revisit.
I described the pain to my OB today at my appointment thusly:
"Imagine you were me. Pregnant with CP. Then imagine that you had to simultaneously bike the Tour de France AND do the "Rocky" stair climb. Hit repeat til dead."
This is what it feels like I've done to my body.
His paraphrased answer was:
"sucks to be you, but there isn't really anything I can do."
And BTW, It will "get worse before it gets better."
Fuuuuuuuuuc.......me.
(Wait, that's how I got into this mess.)
He has told me to stay in bed.
Great.
Bed Rest.
He also suggested regular prenatal massages.....
As that is not a service covered by Medi-Cal or our wallets, it looks like I'll have to make due with the shower head aimed strategically and set to (as my husband has so charmingly deemed it) "masturbate".
Oh, the joys that lie ahead.
62 days.
Oh.My.SWEET.LOOOOORDY.
PS.
Owen is fine.
So am I.
Okay.
Not really, but I'm not near death or anything.
I just want to disconnect the top half of my body from the lower half.
No Big.
I should be back to my only "slightly gimpy" self after he is born.
And, No.
It is not okay for you to use the term "gimpy" in my presence either....
That seems like eons from now. Induction is seeming more and more lovely. Ha!
To be frank-
I am in so much pain, I can't F&^#ing STAND IT.
My lower body and its corresponding muscles and joints are staging a revolt.
They've been at if for a months, and they're not being peaceful about it...
They're making me feel useless and handicapped.
While I technically AM handicapped (I prefer the term disabled. Never use "handicapable in my presence, k? It will not end well), it's been a long time since I have truly felt that way.
I can't get out of bed without help. The stairs are my nemesis. I started crying while trying to put on my own underwear.
These are some old, familiar, feelings that I never wanted to revisit.
I described the pain to my OB today at my appointment thusly:
"Imagine you were me. Pregnant with CP. Then imagine that you had to simultaneously bike the Tour de France AND do the "Rocky" stair climb. Hit repeat til dead."
This is what it feels like I've done to my body.
His paraphrased answer was:
"sucks to be you, but there isn't really anything I can do."
And BTW, It will "get worse before it gets better."
Fuuuuuuuuuc.......me.
(Wait, that's how I got into this mess.)
He has told me to stay in bed.
Great.
Bed Rest.
He also suggested regular prenatal massages.....
As that is not a service covered by Medi-Cal or our wallets, it looks like I'll have to make due with the shower head aimed strategically and set to (as my husband has so charmingly deemed it) "masturbate".
Oh, the joys that lie ahead.
62 days.
Oh.My.SWEET.LOOOOORDY.
PS.
Owen is fine.
So am I.
Okay.
Not really, but I'm not near death or anything.
I just want to disconnect the top half of my body from the lower half.
No Big.
I should be back to my only "slightly gimpy" self after he is born.
And, No.
It is not okay for you to use the term "gimpy" in my presence either....
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Progress, Ho!
Hoooooraaaaaay! We've made some headway!
The dresser has been bought, built and filled to the brim. Already. Eek!
The landing has been cleaned up and organized.
Our computer and desk has been set-up and is functional.
Our doula has been hired, contracts are signed, and the birth plan is written.
Owen's guardianship has been locked down.
We're about ready to sign on a life insurance policy, we're just waiting for the underwriting process, and then we can FINALLY finish up the Will business.
We have our tour of the maternity wing this week, we're doing a 4D ultrasound on Saturday, and the first baby shower is on Sunday.
Progress! Signs of organization!
And my heart rejoices!
The dresser has been bought, built and filled to the brim. Already. Eek!
The landing has been cleaned up and organized.
Our computer and desk has been set-up and is functional.
Our doula has been hired, contracts are signed, and the birth plan is written.
Owen's guardianship has been locked down.
We're about ready to sign on a life insurance policy, we're just waiting for the underwriting process, and then we can FINALLY finish up the Will business.
We have our tour of the maternity wing this week, we're doing a 4D ultrasound on Saturday, and the first baby shower is on Sunday.
Progress! Signs of organization!
And my heart rejoices!
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
The Moonbeams of (Pending) Motherhood...
So I've decided that this entry should be a more optimistic one than my most recent posts.
That instead of scaring the bejeezus out of my childless friends, I should talk about all the warm and fuzzies of being pregnant...and comfort them in their potential futures...
Now, you may be thinking to yourself:
"But doesn't that go EXACTLY against what you were just railing on about in your last blog?"
Maybe, but I'm not going to lie about any of the hearts and flowers, so not really.
Let's get started!
"Things that are Awesome About Being Pregnant": or, "Why Stretchmarks on Your Lovehandles Really ARE Worth it!"*
(*This list is based on my personal experiences, and may not be the same for all people)
1. Someone loves you enough to create a human being with you. Loving someone so much that you want to create a life with him/her, is so beautiful, it's beyond words.
2. You as a woman, are a superbeing. CMON, you're growing AND HOUSING a child in your belly! How Pimp is that? Men would never survive, I'm convinced.
3. Gaining weight is encouraged. (Within a reasonable limit, of course.) I don't think I've been encouraged to GAIN weight since March of '81...it's very freeing.
4. Eating has never been so wonderful. Once you get past the vomiting stage, food becomes your BFF. Seriously. There's not much that makes me happier than food these days. The best part? Your loved ones/spouse will give you WHATEVER you want! Donut a 2pm? Okay! Tacos at 2am? We'll find a way!
5. The amount of love and adoration you feel for your child really does make everything else manageable. It's the most powerful thing I have ever felt in my life.
6. Feeling the baby move and grow. It's indescribable. Sure, it comes with its issues, but that doesn't matter. IT IS SO FREAKING COOL. This tiny little person is in there, making his presence known INSIDE YOUR BELLY.
7. Growing as a person. Learning that you are going to be a parent forces you to really get your shit together. To let go of things you've been hanging on to, that in the grand scheme of your life-DOESN'T matter. It forces you to see the good things in yourself, and to clean up the not-so-stellar things.
8. Looking forward to the future. I spend a ton of time daydreaming about what my son will look/sound/be like. I think about all the things that I want to show him, the places I want to take him, the life I want to give him. Will it all be perfect and exactly as I envision it? NO. But, I know that as long as he feels loved, wanted and accepted, with a solid sense of self- he will have a great life. This means that my greatest job in life is to love a child, and my most triumphant success will be him coming through life knowing that he is loved and valuable. Nothing on Earth could be better than that. It makes everything that I "thought" were measures of success, and constantly beat myself up for not having, look ridiculous in comparison.
Does this mean that I will stop stressing about money or financial stability? Not even close....but I have stopped seeing that as the only thing that solidifies my worthiness in the world.
I am bringing a life into this world, damnit. I'm kinda a big deal.
And that, my friends, is just a brief shine on "Pregnancy-It's So Nifty": or, "Why I Didn't SOB When I Discovered the Stretchmarks Crawling up my Lovehandles Yesterday"
That instead of scaring the bejeezus out of my childless friends, I should talk about all the warm and fuzzies of being pregnant...and comfort them in their potential futures...
Now, you may be thinking to yourself:
"But doesn't that go EXACTLY against what you were just railing on about in your last blog?"
Maybe, but I'm not going to lie about any of the hearts and flowers, so not really.
Let's get started!
"Things that are Awesome About Being Pregnant": or, "Why Stretchmarks on Your Lovehandles Really ARE Worth it!"*
(*This list is based on my personal experiences, and may not be the same for all people)
1. Someone loves you enough to create a human being with you. Loving someone so much that you want to create a life with him/her, is so beautiful, it's beyond words.
2. You as a woman, are a superbeing. CMON, you're growing AND HOUSING a child in your belly! How Pimp is that? Men would never survive, I'm convinced.
3. Gaining weight is encouraged. (Within a reasonable limit, of course.) I don't think I've been encouraged to GAIN weight since March of '81...it's very freeing.
4. Eating has never been so wonderful. Once you get past the vomiting stage, food becomes your BFF. Seriously. There's not much that makes me happier than food these days. The best part? Your loved ones/spouse will give you WHATEVER you want! Donut a 2pm? Okay! Tacos at 2am? We'll find a way!
5. The amount of love and adoration you feel for your child really does make everything else manageable. It's the most powerful thing I have ever felt in my life.
6. Feeling the baby move and grow. It's indescribable. Sure, it comes with its issues, but that doesn't matter. IT IS SO FREAKING COOL. This tiny little person is in there, making his presence known INSIDE YOUR BELLY.
7. Growing as a person. Learning that you are going to be a parent forces you to really get your shit together. To let go of things you've been hanging on to, that in the grand scheme of your life-DOESN'T matter. It forces you to see the good things in yourself, and to clean up the not-so-stellar things.
8. Looking forward to the future. I spend a ton of time daydreaming about what my son will look/sound/be like. I think about all the things that I want to show him, the places I want to take him, the life I want to give him. Will it all be perfect and exactly as I envision it? NO. But, I know that as long as he feels loved, wanted and accepted, with a solid sense of self- he will have a great life. This means that my greatest job in life is to love a child, and my most triumphant success will be him coming through life knowing that he is loved and valuable. Nothing on Earth could be better than that. It makes everything that I "thought" were measures of success, and constantly beat myself up for not having, look ridiculous in comparison.
Does this mean that I will stop stressing about money or financial stability? Not even close....but I have stopped seeing that as the only thing that solidifies my worthiness in the world.
I am bringing a life into this world, damnit. I'm kinda a big deal.
And that, my friends, is just a brief shine on "Pregnancy-It's So Nifty": or, "Why I Didn't SOB When I Discovered the Stretchmarks Crawling up my Lovehandles Yesterday"
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