Basically, these are all topics I'd planned on writing a blog each on, but realized I just didn't have the energy.
So I lazily cobbled this together!
(I really know how to SELL it, right?)
Struggling with depression in a big way.
The fatigue is even worse.
(I feel like my CFS is getting worse.
Hoping it's just pregnancy...)
Which is forms an ever-so-helpful film of uselessness that clings to my heart and mind these days, suffocating me.
Depression and Chronic Fatigue are assholes.
Still radio silence on the employment front.
Applying/circulating to just about anything/anyone is still the name of the game.
Yet, we're having to weigh gas prices to pay to unemployment benefits, etc.
We've realized that over the last 5 years, we've fallen into the "desperation trap" taking crap jobs just for the sake of a job, rather than looking at the career-term picture...
Which has barely done anything to *really* help us.
Not that we're really in a position to be choosy at this point--
But we would like to break the cycle if we can.
Huz is taking some online classes in hopes of beefing up his skill-set from a resume perspective, but it's definitely not a quick-fix and there doesn't seem to be any opportunities forthcoming...
We're just holding on and hoping.
O is driving his mama and daddy to a sleep-deprived grave.
He's completely given up his nap, which he frankly did back in December when we put him in his big-boy bed, but I was in denial...
So yeah. No nap.
He wakes up at 5:00-30 am no matter what.
We've tried early bed time, late bed time, sound machines, blackout shades, death threats (kidding!), everything.
Does not MATTAH.
7:30-8pm to 5:00-30am
With no nap.
My runs-his-ass-off-gets-CRANKY-when-sleepy Child.
We've considered dosing him, but figured that would just be a slippery slope...
We're working on consequences and following directions.
I think he's even more stubborn than me.
Baby P is moving and grooving in the womb, and making her mama very fat...okay, so it could be all the emotional eating...
In my defense?
Girlfriend kicks me 'til I eat.
All in all though, she'd healthy and working her way toward the finish line.
We have a 3D US scheduled for May 23rd which I'm excited about.
Can't wait to see her little faaaace!
My joints are killing me, and I've taken up residence in a recliner for the sleepings since late March, which sucks, but laying in bed is too painful.
The recliner is miiiiles better than the poang chair of O's gestation.
Mobility is rabidly escaping me.
She's worth it, as was O.
Not sure it takes the sting off being able to feel stretch marks through my shirt though...
Ain't mudderhood grand?
To sum up:
Life, in a lot of ways, is a demoralizing mess, but it's got potential...
A good friend asked me the other day how life was, and I said:
"Well, we're broke and depressed, living at my in-laws with tiny people, but we still want to be married to each other, so that's gotta be good--right?"
And it is.