Friday, December 10, 2010

All signs point to "Yes"

Sooooo NOT what I was hoping for.

I think I may have Fibromyalgia.

One of my close friends, R, has it and I was talking to her about how I'd been feeling lately (and over the past several years), and she said that all of my symptoms sounded a LOT like Fibromyalgyia.

This was not something I wanted to hear (and I absolutely value her advice/judgment/insight), so just shrugged it off for a long time.

It's just having a new baby...
It's just the Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
It's just the Depression
 It's just the Cerebral Palsy
It's just the Gall Bladder
It's just the Hernia
It's just the IBS
It's just....

But this isn't new...I haven't felt good or "normal" in 6-7 years.
Every day is tough, and it has gotten worse since I've had O.
Sickness/Infection/Stress just compounds it. (Me? Sick? Stressed? Why, that's so RARE.)

I've done all the things I'm supposed to do:
Healthy Diet
No Alcohol/Drugs/Nicotine/Caffeine

Still, I feel like varying degrees of SHIT on a daily basis.
There's never enough sleep.
I hurt all the time.
I feel like I'm in a fog all the time.

But I don't like announcing that daily, because who wants to hear that all the damn time? And regardless of how I feel, O still needs his Mommy and my Husband still needs his wife.

And really, (I started to think) maybe it IS all in my head. Maybe I'm just being a baby....

WTF?  I'm no baby!!

This is legit. Whatever THIS is. But the symptoms/issues don't match up to only CP/CFS/IBS* there has to be another explanation...

Then a few days ago, I was praying for my friend, and all of the things that she has to deal with, and it dawned on me that almost ALL of the physical things that I pray on for her are the things that I struggle with myself.
I started thinking of all the times in the midst of a conversation the words "Me Too!" came out of my mouth...

So I did what we all do these days: Googled my heart out**.

And it wasn't pretty.


So I called R and told her about what I'd read and what I was experiencing...she told me that I should talk to my doctor right away. In the meantime though, an important marker to check were the pressure points.

In FM there are 18 points bilaterally on the body that are painful to the touch of firm pressure in people with the disorder. You must have at least 11 tender spots to be diagnosed.

I refused to look at the points myself. I wanted accuracy.

I waited til the Hubs got home, had him look at the list and then apply pressure to various points, using fake points as well so that I wouldn't subconsciously skew things one way or the other.

I had all of them. All Frikken 18.


But both R and my Hubs made the excellent point that maybe:  THIS is the answer for what's been ailing me.

And if it is, there's medicine that will help control the symptoms and hopefully, improve my quality of life.

There's a novel idea.

I'll be heading to the Doc probably at he the 1st of the year. There's just no money for it right now.
I'll have to have a bunch of blood work done to rule out things like Lupus, MS, and Rheumatoid Arthritis, but if those all come back clean (FM is a negative diagnosis) then we've got an answer. Interestingly enough, I learned that that people with FM are more likely to also have CFS and IBS....go figure.

While I'm not excited about being even unhealthier, it would be a relief to know that I'm not crazy, that I am legitimately*** ill, and that there's actually something that can be done to help it.

We'll address how  in the hell we'd afford the meds when we cross the prescribed bridge. I wanna end on a positive-ish note....

At least we can safely assume it's not Lupus. Because as Greg House has taught us all, it's  
never Lupus.

Until it is, but ya know, whatever.

* So many acronyms, so little time...errr, health.

**How did we LIVE before Google? I just don't know!

***A lot of folks think Cerebal Palsy is only legit if you're in a wheel chair or pushing a walker and have crazy leg braces...all things which I've had/done before, but since I'm pretty self-ambulatory, I've been 86'd from the club as it were. And Chronic Fatigue Syndrome? Most people just think I need to take more naps or just stop being lazy. Yes, people have REALLY said that to me. To my face, even. IBS? Don't even bother!


Kat said...

Drug companies will give you free meds if:
1. You fill out thier application (go to the drug prescibed to you's website)
2. Have an "advocate" in your doctors office fill out more paperwork. It always has to be the same person I believe. Our medical assistant used to do it for patients.
3. And I think you have to have a 90 script mailed to the company from your doctor along with aforementioned paperwork.
4. Lots of hoops, but so worth it, they will mail to the dr's office a 90 day supply, and you pick it up from them. For free.

he calls me wifey said...

okay, so this might sound weird, but i kind of hope that you find out that this is what you have because, like you said, it would mean you could have more options as to how to treat the issues. does that make sense? i hope that doesn't sound like i'm saying i hope you have FM, because obviously i wish you didn't have to deal with daily pain at all.

but, just so you know, i will be praying that you can get to the doctor soon and figure this thing out so that you can hopefully get treatment and live the pain free life you deserve!!

<3 you

Kacie said...

they've said it to YOUR FACE?!
are they dense????
how rude!

i DO hope you find out what's going on and that there is medicine that can help, or miraculous healing!!! i've seen it before! it can't help to hope right? :) i'll be praying!!

Happy Fun Pants said...

What a relief to know what is most likely ailing you!

I'm so proud that you decided to test it with accuracy and that you will be able to see the doc in the first of the year.

YAY you...and yay for your soon diagnosis and medicine that will help you feel much much MUCH better.

Lupie Mama said...

Hey Lady! So sorry to hear you have the pressure points, I went through the whole being freaked out of the unknown of what having FM means, then the frustration of doctors telling me it was all in my head, then having a tough time finding a treatment that was helpful, etc... (gotta love the medical field). But once you've been through that and accepted it and find something that can help you cope (like Lyrica), it won't feel like it's taking over your life. It's weird to say but the peace of knowing you have it does help. I'm never not in pain but I've figured out what contributes to flare ups and how to manage pain so it's tolerable most of the time. Best pain medicine so far is my little precious kiddo, so I'm glad you've already got yourself set up with one of those ;). Plus you have a pretty amazing Hubbs which has got to be a HUGE help with your stress/pain levels. I love you, you better know you can call me ANY time! You bless me everytime we talk :). xoxoxo

kristi said...

I'm encouraged to hear that you might be on the road to finding some relief from your fatigue and pain! What a relief it must be to hear there might be an answer lying in the road ahead! Granted, I want nothing more for you to be 110% healthy and well, but if you do have FM and there is something out there to help you, I'm excited!

I'm praying that 2011 will be your year!! :)

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