Did I say "Tired and Fat?" No, I TOTALLY meant "Blissful and Womanly." Really!

No I didn't. I'm a liar.

What I meant to say was: EXHAUSTED and GINORMOUS.

And, And, ANDDDD....

I'd really like to have control of my bladder back.


But that's not what people want to hear when they ask how you are doing in your pregnancy.


Because if I told them that my feet are painfully swollen, that I have menopausal-level hot flashes, that my back and hips are in so much pain it feels like they're trying to secede from the union that is my skeletal system, and peeing my pants is becoming a daily occurrence--that thing will happen where their eyes sorta glaze over and that polite smile crosses their face....

Uh Oh. I've lost them and have now entered that awkward territory.

You know the one, that place where the person you just said that to tries to then reassure you that you will love being a mother and love your baby?

For Pete's sake!

Of course I will love being a mother! Of COURSE of will love my baby! I already do!


I'm ECSTATIC to be pregnant, I'm just having a rough time with some of the "side effects," if you will.


So I smile and jokingly say "tired and fat"...hee hee!

I thought this was safe. Humourous, light, not a lie, but not the full story--you know, keepin' it casual....


Until I said it to one of my MILs friends while were were having lunch.

This was her response:

"Oh, honey, you don't know the half of it. This is the easy part!" "Just enjoy it, because your next pregnancy will never be as easy as your first, especially with another little one running around, so appreciate this magical time, because you NEVER get to have a first pregnancy again."


Well, shit.

Now, I feel like an asshole for not appreciating my pregnancy enough, AND you've completely terrified me about having a second child.


Awesome.

Pass the butter. I'll stuff down my fears with carbs for the time-being.


Soooo nice to see you, btw. So nice.

Thanks.